19w0d

I am still here!! Sorry for my long silence. After I returned from that conference I had to work as the inpatient attending for hematology/oncology consults at the VA hospital. That is a 7 day a week job, for 2 weeks straight. And of course I am still working this week, too, so I am currently on day 16 out of 19 in a row!! That is probably one of my longest stretches ever, but I have to admit that the weekends weren't too bad...I only went in for a few hours each day. Being the attending is a lot less busy than being the fellow, resident, or intern!! However, it comes with a different stress: that of being the final decision maker and the responsible party. I was lucky to be working with a responsible and attentive fellow, though, so I really can't complain at all.

Anyway, let's see... On August 13 (17w1d), I had a regular doctor's appointment and finally met "my" OB, Dr. K. I saw her once for a Pap smear... in 2006, I believe, and to be honest, I had completely forgotten what she looked like. I'm sure she didn't remember me, either. The appointment was really too quick for me to form much of an opinion of her. It was really just a "pee in a cup, blood pressure, weigh in, check baby heartbeat, any questions?" kind of appointment which lasted about 10 minutes total. She didn't even palpate my uterus! Oh well, she was nice enough, and I don't think she'll be doing the actual delivery anyway.

In other news, I still haven't felt any fetal movements, and I have been spending several minutes each day in intense concentration, trying to feel something, anything. My stomach is fairly active in general, and I haven't felt anything that strikes me as different than the usual digestive sensations. I have read about a lot of people on line who are feeling definite movement already (even first-time moms), but I'm trying not to stress about it. ("Anterior placenta!" is one of my mantras.) During the aforementioned 17w1d appointment, I mentioned it to Dr. K, and while she was listening to the heartbeat, there were several "thumps" that she said were fetal movements (and I felt nothing), so that was reassuring. Also, I am definitely expanding in the baby bump department, so I think that somebody must be growing in there! Suddenly I find myself up 8.6 lbs total. I feel like I am gaining too fast right now, so I probably need to watch out.

A couple of funny anecdotes from yesterday:
1) Most the time at work, I have been shielding my changing midsection with my white coat. Yesterday, however, I was wearing a very loose, maternity-ish (but not really) short sleeved sweater. I hadn't put on the coat yet when I walked into a morning conference. A little while later, one of the surgeons came up to me and said, "I didn't know that you were pregnant!" Well, I'm not sure whether she had the opportunity to confirm what she saw with someone else, or whether she was merely being observant, but she IF she made the observation on her own without confirmation, she may have been the first person brave enough to say anything to me! Yippee! On the other hand, my aunt saw me on Saturday in (non-maternity) running shorts and shirt and said, "Oh, I can't tell you're pregnant at ALL!" Ah well.

2) Also yesterday, I was seeing a particular breast cancer patient for the second time ever. I sat down and talked with her for a while, then stood to examine her. I think I might have gotten up awkwardly or something because she said, "Oh, are you OK??" I said, "Yes, I'm fine. Why do you ask?" She said, "I don't really know... you just look tired... maybe like you're pregnant or something..." I then confirmed her guess and then said, "It sounds like you're pretty intuitive about this stuff. Any guess about whether it's a boy or a girl?" She immediately reached out for my belly (through the white coat) and proclaimed "Boy!"

So, what gender is our baby? I'm at 19 weeks... we should know by now, right? Well, we have another 33+ hours to wait... our big ultrasound is scheduled for Thursday at 7:30 AM. Honestly, S and I don't care. We just want a healthy baby. I will be absolutely thrilled either way. I have to say that I am guessing "boy" too, though. I don't really know why, but that's my guess based on a non-scientific observation about my complete lack of morning sickness. Apparently my mom and my aunt are guessing "boy," too. Another person recently guessed "Boy...because your arms and face are staying skinny," (not sure if I agree with that). On the other hand, one woman at my work has guessed, "Girl...because your face doesn't look drawn and tired like it would if you were carrying a boy." A four year old that I consulted said, "Boy" one week, but changed her mind to "girl" a few weeks later.

Pink or blue... either one will be incredibly loved. I just can't wait to see our little one again on Thursday morning!

A big joyous congrats to Hilary and D in Vancouver! (http://tryingwithpcos.blogspot.com/). 41 weeks, baby Maya is here! Yay for IVF success stories!